Okay, am I the only one having issues with the dA submit box autowrapping tags? It's really frustrating argharghargh
›NAME: Lucio Fletcher. Introduces himself as Luca.
›BIRTHDAY: Seventeenth of February. Ah, sweet summer child~
Except, you know, not actually sweet.
›AGE: 14 (Fourth year)
›HEIGHT: 159 cm. ("One fifty nine POINT FIVE, DUMBASS.")
›WEIGHT: Fifty one kilos. "And if I catch you trying to check out my ass I'll personally ensure that you regret every single detail of your birth, from the direction in which your pathetic umbilical cord was cut to the fact that you ever fucking survived it."
›HOUSE: Hufflepuff. Heh.
Smash dem destructive house stereotypes bby. Smash dem.
›PET: "Fuck no, I already have to deal with myself twenty-four seven, I'm not going to inflict my toxic hell of an existence upon some other miserable creature, dubiously sentient or not." (In reality, the fact is that his family is not wealthy enough to afford to keep a pet comfortably.
There there Luca, no one has to know how pathetic you secretly are.)
Instead of a familiar, he has a pet cactus named Bertamaia Humperdinckle. And no matter how much you water her, she's still going to spike you with glee. I think that sums up everything about her that you would ever want to know.
›WAND: yew | unicorn hair | 11.5' | supple
Finite incantatem - Counters a spell as it is being cast, or cancels an ongoing effect.
Hot-Air Charm - Releases a jet of hot air from the end of the wand.
I don't know, it just seems to come to him so naturally. Uehehe.
Nox Charm - Dispels a lumos charm.
Because nostalgia. Wink wink.
Protego - Creates a shield from the caster's wand which deflects jinxes, hexes, and curses.
Impervius Charm - Renders an object impenetrable.
Episkey - A simple healing charm.
(The truth is, despite Luca's
alleged desire to make things explode spectacularly, only passive stuff seems to come to him naturally.)
-Study of Ancient Runes
-Xylomancy. (He heard that basically no one does xylomancy, and promptly decided that it sounded ideal.)
-Hogwarts Orchestra. He plays the xylophone lel. (Once during detention the teacher handed him two glockenspiel mallets and told him to "take out his anger in a constructive manner", after that he was conscripted into the orchestra. In actual fact, Luca can play the cello , but like hell is he going to tell anyone that. Thus, to the rest of the orchestra kids, he is forever known as the percussion guy whose full dynamic range is fortissimissimo.)
Fucking Abrasive | Trustworthy | Rude | Loyal | Rude | Perpetually Angry | Rude | Diligent | Ridiculously Confrontational | Rude | Retroactive Overthinker | Rude
I am serious about the rude, his spew of maladjusted anger is on the setting labeled NEVER-ENDING. And there are no other settings. Luca is really really politically incorrect, and generally as offensive as he can possibly be. That being said, the way he treats everyone, while shitty, is equally shitty; by which I mean the shit is spread round in a warm, even cover of festering dung that smears anything unfortunate enough to come under his perpetually enraged gaze.
Personality-wise, he embodies a lot of the less-remembered traits of the badger:
One of the most aggressive, solitary and ill tempered members of the animal kingdom, there is a general belief that nothing of comparable size can overcome the badger. Its ferocity, sharp teeth and strong claws make it a formidable foe... And if worst comes to worst, the badger can run backwards as fast as forwards!
Yes, especially that last bit welp
Luca may be more than ready to rip your head off at the slightest provocation, but if he tells you he'll do something he really will, and he actually does possess vast amounts of loyalty (though he makes sure that everyone is fully aware that his house pride has officially hit negative infinity), and he is a true believer in hard work. Some of his strongest
jealousy disgust is reserved for people who swan through classes without making even a token effort. (Especially since Luca himself has been consistently achieving absurdly average marks ever since first year, no matter how hard he works. But if he stops studying even a little, his marks really do take a six pointer off the deep end, so.)
Luca tends to do and say things which he severely regrets once he's cooled off (usually about five minutes later). This is due in part to the fact that he is a really terrible retroactive overthinker, but also because offending other people, or worse, making them cry without
completely meaning to is his specialty.
Luca's father was non magic, and his mother a witch, making Luca himself a halfblood. And this hybridity (heh) happens in more ways than one, since, though he was born and has lived in Britain his entire life, his mother was an immigrant from Portugal.
He can in fact speak a little Portuguese, but not very well. About google translate levels of grammatic failure - which is extremely convenient, amirite? :'D
Luca's mother was a pureblood. When she met Luca's father, a car mechanic with a quirky sense of humour and an unexpected repertoire of synonyms, it really was True Love. Sadly, while merely dating a "mudblood" was a redeemable offense, marrying one was not, and her purist uncle, who was the head of the family, promptly cut her out of the inheritance and exiled her for good. [Here you may imagine me waving my writer wand and casting the deux ex machina spell liberally, and everywhere.]
When Luca was seven, his father died of stomach cancer. This had a profound impact upon their small family, not just emotionally but financially as well. While his mother was able to earn enough through teaching cello to keep them both fed, they ended up having to move to a much worse neighbourhood. In school, what with his whole runty, twiggy appearance and general lack-of-a-dad, Luca was often seen as an ideal target for bullying - at least until he discovered the joys of storing up his rage in a pressure cooker deep inside, then letting it spew at the slightest provocation. After a while, his anger, which had started out as a defensive measure, became something he fell back on as a default (except at home with his mother. Luca at school and Luca at home are two completely different creatures uehehe.)
Naturally, Luca came to be known a child with some deeply
very deeply entrenched behavioral issues. Luckily for his school record though, he proved to be severely disinclined towards physical violence of any kind, so he managed to get through much of school by attending in a more or less permanent state of detention (for miscellaneous gems of disrespect towards students and/or teachers). The bullies eventually learnt to leave him alone, and after a while, so did everyone else. And Luca tells himself that he is not lonely at all, of course not, and anyhow even if he is (which he isn't), it's entirely his own fault since he can't seem to be able to stay around other people for long before losing his temper and saying things he regrets and watching them stomp away and then just awkwardly avoiding them in the hallways and classrooms until that awful typical moment one day when they accidentally bump shoulders and they mumble civil or in his case, uncivil apologies, and the notion that they were ever almost maybe potentially friends is such a desiccated corpse of a thing that not even a necromancer with aspirations towards world domination would bother attempting to resurrect it...
...Um, where was I going with this again? Whatever. The point here is that Lucio Fletcher is a born loner with anger management issues, and if he met a troll in the hallways of Hogwarts he'd attempt to shout it into submission before even thinking of drawing his wand. (And this, ladies and gentlemen, is reason #2 why he's probably going to die before he even finishes his long awaited growth spurt.
Reason #1 being that he finally irritates someone to the point of insanity, and they do the world at large a favour by disemboweling him and beating him to death with his own large intestine.)
A couple of months before Luca turned eleven, he received the letter form Hogwarts. His mother was delighted and somewhat surprised, since she herself could hardly be considered a legitimate citizen of magical Britain. Nevertheless, in her first display of actual proper witchery (according to Luca, because clearly magic spells don't count) she took him to Diagon Alley. There she bought (and named) Bertamaia Humperdinckle. Despite having a magical mother, Hogwarts came as a bit of a shock to Luca.
So did his Sorting into Hufflepuff. Uehehe.
Reading: Particularly fantasy, especially Lord of the Rings
which may explain his tendency towards rambling, though his particular brand involves more invectives than Tolkien probably ever knew.
Gardening: Mainly only of Bertamaia Humperdinckle, since working in the school greenhouse would require interaction with Real Human Beings.
Anything made up of at least 40% sugar: Seriously. Anything.
Horror movies: He cannot stand them.
Game of Thrones HBO series: He hates it but watches it anyway because he hates Joffrey more and enjoys therapeutically raging on him. (When Joffrey dies he'll probably throw a massive hissy fit because he won't have anyone to practice his favourite verbal stomps on anymore.)
Messiness: His section of the room is immaculate. His uniform is always clean. Every meal he separates the food on his plate into distinct sections by colour. It's freaky.
None so far
unsurprisingly. Luca's best and only friend is Bertamaia. Sorry bby, you're forever alone :'D
Warning - Foul Language
Could I ever have given him any voice other than Karkat? The answer is no, hell no, I know of no alternate dimension in which such a thing might happen, and if it exists, do not speak to me of it, because I do not wish to hear of such a travesty.